This chapter explores how understanding and preparing for force—both offensive and defensive—allows you to act effectively when necessary.
Choose Your Weapon
Pick a Weapon to Defend Yourself
They will tell you that self-defense is paranoid. That carrying a weapon is extreme. That violence is never the answer. This is how they weaken you. Violence is already being used against you. It always has been. The only question is whether you will be ready when it comes.
This is not about being reckless. This is not about escalation. This is about knowing that, when the moment arrives, you will not be helpless. A woman who knows how to defend herself is dangerous. Be dangerous!
Choosing Your Weapon
Self-defense is not one-size-fits-all. You need to choose something that fits you—your body, your lifestyle, your comfort level. You need to know how you will fight before you’re forced to. Here are some options to get the selection process started:
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Your voice - Words can stop fights before they start. The right tone, the right command, the right lie can make an attacker hesitate just long enough for you to escape—or for you to strike first.
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Your fists - Your body is a weapon if you know how to use it. Learn where to strike, how to break holds, how to escape.
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Pepper spray - Legal in most places, small enough to carry, and effective when used correctly.
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A knife - Requires training but is deadly in the right hands. If you carry one, learn how to wield it.
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A firearm - A great equalizer, but not for the careless. If you choose this route, take it seriously, train, practice, respect the responsibility.
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A stun gun or taser - Close-contact, but effective for disabling an attacker.
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The written word - Never underestimate the power of a well-placed message. A manifesto can rally an army. A single letter can shatter an empire. A written defense can save your life in court. If you know how to wield it, words are weapons sharper than steel.
You can use improvised weapons: a heavy flashlight, a pen, a set of keys, your bag, a pitchfork. Anything can be a weapon if you know what you’re doing. The best weapon is the one you have with you when you need it, and one you feel comfortable wielding.
Know the Law
Before you carry anything, learn the self-defense laws where you live. What is legal to carry? What are your rights if you use it? What will the legal system say if you defend yourself? Knowledge is as critical as the weapon itself. And sometimes, knowledge is the weapon. The right legal argument, the right piece of legislation, the right historical precedent can keep you out of a prison cell—or put the enemy in one.
Training is Non-Negotiable
A weapon you don’t know how to use is a liability.
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If you carry a knife, learn how to fight with it.
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If you carry a gun, train until it is second nature.
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If you carry pepper spray, practice drawing it quickly.
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If you’re a “hands-on” person, learn how to throw a punch that ends the fight.
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If you rely on your words, learn to speak with precision. Study rhetoric. Master deception. Know how to make people listen.
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If you use writing, refine it until your words cut deeper than a blade. Make them undeniable. Make them dangerous.
They expect you to be unarmed, untrained, and afraid. Make sure they’re wrong.
First Task: Pick Your Weapon
The future of your defense starts today:
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Decide what weapon you’re comfortable wielding.
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If you already have a weapon, practice using it.
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If you don’t, research your options and make a plan to acquire one.
"The sword is more important than the shield, and skill is more important than either."
— Miyamoto Musashi
Historical Reflection
The Dahomey Amazons
For centuries, the world has insisted that weapons belong in the hands of men, that women must rely on others for protection. The Dahomey Amazons shattered that illusion. For over 200 years, they trained, fought, and ruled as one of history’s most elite military forces—not just among women, but among warriors of any kind. They did not wait for protection. They were the protection.
The Kingdom of Dahomey, in what is now Benin, was a military powerhouse, and unlike other societies that confined women to the home, it trained them for war. Girls as young as eight were recruited into the Agojie, taught to wield machetes, muskets, and their own bodies as weapons. Their training was merciless; running through thorn bushes, climbing walls lined with blades, enduring pain without flinching. They practiced decapitation on captured prisoners, ensuring that when they entered battle, hesitation would not be their weakness. They swore off marriage and children, devoting themselves entirely to combat. Their loyalty was singular. Their purpose was clear.
By the 18th century, the Dahomey Amazons had become one of the most feared military units in the world. They led charges into battle, moving with ruthless precision, their discipline unmatched. They fought against European colonizers and rival kingdoms, often emerging victorious despite facing better-armed enemies. French soldiers, hardened by war, feared them for their relentless ferocity, their refusal to surrender. Even when outgunned, they did not retreat. They did not ask for mercy, and they did not give it. Some European accounts describe them as nearly superhuman, fighting with an endurance and intensity that shook even the most seasoned troops. Their battle cries were said to haunt their enemies long after the fighting ended.
The Dahomey Amazons understood a truth most societies sought to bury: the world will not protect you—you must be your own weapon. They mastered the tools of their time, proving that strength is not about size or gender but skill, training, and the will to fight. They remind us that choosing a weapon is choosing power, that no one has the right to deny you either.